Of course, all parents are aware that yelling is not the right pedagogical approach. But we often raise our voices anyway. Is this really that harmful? Both psychologists and pediatricians agree: “Yes” – shouting does not help, and the damage is many:
1. To yell scares children
Imagine a giant with a strong and evil voice screaming at you. Are you scared? The child too. Especially if you have to defend yourself from this monster, and it’s mom or dad, who must be protection and support.
2. To yell is harmful to health
First on the list of consequences are stress and neurosis. Then there are weight problems: like adults, children also tend to eat sweets because they are sad. The immune system also suffers from stress – children get sick more often. In addition, in children and adolescents it affects the character, in students it reduces their performance and concentration.
3. Undermines trust
You can love someone who regularly insults, insults or scares you. Children are able to forgive us many things. But to trust and reveal – hardly. It’s just that fear is hard to reconcile with intimate conversations. That is why it is difficult to trust someone who can raise his voice and shout at you at any moment. And every time you will be afraid to tell about your secret – you just got a scream. That is why children share less and less with their parents and solve their problems on their own.
4. Creates wrong habits
Children who are accustomed to being spoken to in a high voice do not really listen in a calm voice and do not fall into quiet contemplation. Is it their fault if they are used to such a manner of communication? In addition, children often consider such behavior to be normal and patiently tolerate rudeness from friends and others.
5. To yell set a bad example
“My son is rude to others and doesn’t listen! My daughter answers me! You can’t talk to them calmly – they have no respect!” Yes, adults often complain about the rudeness of adolescents. And just as often they don’t notice that they are actually imitating the big ones.
What to do if you are about to explode? Try to find another vent to your anger and teach this to the child as well. To say that you are angry or offended is more correct, though more complicated, than just shouting.